I've moved...

Hi y'all...due to some technical problems...I've moved to www.haniebunie.blogspot.com. i'll see you there!!!

Dear Apai,

Today Mama hantar Apai pergi school. Tapi bila dah sampai depan gate, Mama cakap "Bye, Apai". tapi Apai tak tengok mama pun.. apai terus turun dan terus lari masuk kelas jumpa kawan kawan.

Tiba-tiba mama rasa sedih. Kenapa anak kesayangan mama ni buat mama macam ni? Ohh.. baru Mama teringat... sebelum tu..mama ada tegur Apai sebab Apai buat perangai sikit pagi tadi. Mama rasa sebab itulah Apai marah kat mama kan? Sampai Apai tak nak bye dekat mama tadi.

Hmmm takpe lah sayang. Mama tak kisah. Yang penting Apai faham apa kesalahan yang Apai dah buat dan kenapa Mama tegur Apai. Mama nak Apai jadi orang yang baik-baik dan dah jadi tanggung jawab Mama sebagai ibu untuk tegur apa yang tak betul.

Memang Mama rasa sebak sikit pagi tadi. Tapi mama padamkan jelah sebab mama tak nak anak mama berdosa..dan inilah balasan pada mama..sebab mama ingat lagi masa mama kecik kecik dulu mama pun pernah buat kat nenek macam ni sebab masa tu mama marah kat nenek.

Ok lah sayang...Mama akan tetap berdoa agar Apai akan jadi anak yang soleh. Mama sayang Apai. Apai jgn buat macamni lagi ok?


Mama

Putaran Hidup

Kita selalu dengar orang mengungkapkan kata-kata..." Hidup ini bagaikan Roda". Memang betul..sekejap kita akan berada dibawah dan sekejap lagi kita akan berada diatas. Sebab itu jugalah kita jangan berbuat jahat atau berperasaan dengki khianat pada orang lain..kerana suatu hari nanti ia akan berbalik semula pada kita.

Beberapa hari yang lalu ...hubby menelefon emak. Berita yang kurang enak telah sampai jauh dari utara. Ayah dah tak berapa sihat. Dan jiran-jiran pun dah ramai menziarah ayah. Masa tu memang rasa terkejut sangat dengar berita itu. Rupanya dari minggu lepas lagi Ayah dah agak uzur tapi untuk tidak merisaukan anak kesayangan dia di K.L ni, dia melarang emak dari menyampaikan perkhabaran mereka disana.

Sebulan yang lalu, ketika Ayah dan emak datang ke K.L, memang ada perbezaan dari segi tingkah lakunya. Dia lebih mendiamkan diri dan tidak selincah dan segirang dulu melayan kerenah cucu-cucunya. Pemerhatian yang dibuat, aku pendamkan saja dalam hati. Malas nak bagitau pada hubby.

Sejak beberapa hari ni..aku kerap menelefon ibu mertuaku (emak) bertanyakan khabar Ayah.

Dan awal pagi semalam, Ayah jatuh didalam bilik air. Lagi sekali dia melarang emak untuk memberitahu sesiapa pun. Aku menjadi bertambah risau. Dari nada suara emak, tergambar betapa susahnya hati emak..menngenangkan keadaan Ayah. Tapi dia masih cuba untuk menyembunyikan perasaan dia kerana tidak mahu anak dan menantunya risau.

Emak ada memberitahu, buat masa ini dia sudah tidak dapat berfikir apa-apa melainkan dari memikirkan..'benda' itu mungkin sudah menghampiri mereka. Mengenangkan itu, aku rasa sedih..sedih mengenangkan jika ia benar benar berlaku, emak akan berasa sunyi., sepi dan sudah pastinya terasa kehilangan tempat untuk mengadu, bercerita dan bermanja. Anak-anak juga sudah pastunya akan merasa kehilangan yang amat sangat kerana, bila balik ke kampung, Wan lah yang menjadi tumpuan. Mereka sanggup tidak mahu ikut kemana-mana semata-mata hendak menghabiskan masa dengan Wan. Kepulangan kami kesana hujung minggu ini sudah tentu berbeza...Wan mungkin sudah tidak dapat melayan mereka seperti dulu.

Aku berdoa dan berharap...ia takkan datang lagi. Rasanya anak-anak belum puas untuk bermanja dengan Wan.

Aku terfikir..... suatu hari nanti, pastinya aku akan melalui putaran hidup seperti yang emak lalui sekarang. Seandainya dia pergi dulu, aku tak pasti samada aku akan dapat melelapkan mata bila malam menjelma, aku tidak pasti samada aku boleh bangun apabila pagi menjenguk, aku tidak pasti samada mulut boleh mengunyah makanan ketika perut lapar..tetapi yang pasti, pandanganku akan menjadi kabur dan kosong sama seperti hati yang kosong dan sepi. Kekadang terfikir juga..mungkin adalah lebih elok aku pergi dulu sebelum dia...kerana jika dia tiada...aku mungkin akan menjadi seperti bangkai hidup.

Memandangkan emak hanya ada 2 orang anak, dan hubby merupakan anak bongsu, aku telah suarakan pada hubby, seandainya ia benar benar berlaku, aku redha, dan ikhlas untuk menjaga emak....biarlah kami menghiburkan hatinya....ketika dia mengharungi hari -harinya.

Ini kerana, hidup ni bagaikan roda...nasib ku dihari tua...masih samar. Biarlah aku menunjukkan contoh yang baik kepada anak-anak agar menjadi ikutan. Sudah tentu aku mengharapkan belaian kasih sayang anak-anak di kala meniti usia senja. Dan jika aku yang pergi dulu, aku amat berharap agar anak-anak dapat menjaga dan mencurahkan kasih sayang sepenuhnya pada Papa mereka.

begitulah putaran hidup......

Goodbye Bibik.....

Good bye Eli @ bibik..

Terima Kasih kerana menjaga apai & amir seperti anakmu sendiri.

Terima Kasih diatas segala jasamu. Semoga berjaya di dalam apa jua bidang yang diceburi nanti.

Semoga kita bertemu lagi di lain waktu.......

Coffee, Gossips and Scandals.....

I can't live without coffee.. A cuppa coffee a day is enuf to make my butt move.

I was addicted to Nescafe 3in1, but have stopped eversince people kept on saying it's bad for health.

Me and gals will have coffee every morning before we start work. That's the time when we update each other on what's what, who's who and blah blah blah. And that's the best time to let out our frustration and anger. Because you know..there are so many ass-kissing bozos in the office. I guess with the existence of these bozos...come the politics and scandals.

Scandals..oh yeah so many scandals at the office now.

Scandal A

Mr Y is married , with a son. Ms Z is a mother of 3.

yes they are collegues ...but they are also intimate breakfast, lunch partners. Not only that, they park their car side by side wait for each other before going home. It started before Ms Z got pregnant until she delivered her baby...this relationship is still on till now i guess.

Scandal B

Ms A, a mommy too is also having a 'relationship' with Mr B, who had a fiance but is now listed as single. Dating time: very early in the morning at the office of course.

The similarity between these couple, easily irritated when people start to talk about them.

Hahaha...to me if you are not doing the wrong thing..there's no reason why you should feel that way.

I wonder why? Is it for fun? or Is it because they can't get the extra attention and affection from their legal-partners?..hmm maybe.

I'm not denying the fact that women especially, long for attention and affection from their husbands. But it's not an xcuse to get all the special attention, love, care from someone's husband or wife just because your own spouse is unable to do so. This is where communication plays a very important role. The wifey or the hubby should let their partners know. Not to put all the blame on him/ her but more of motivating him/her to treat you how you want it to be.

Have you ever come across a feeling when you feel you are attracted to someone but unfortunately you are married and that someone is also married. And sometimes you wish you can turn back time and perhaps meet this guy/ gal before you met your destiny? Have u ever imagine yourself being with the person you are attracted to?And imagine yourself living happily ever after with that person?

i'm not ashamed to confess that i had that feeling once. But ..i always fall back to fate, the qada' and qadar. When God created someone to be your soulmate..i believe there are reasons for it coz Allah knows whats best for you. And this is my qada' and qadar...i met him and not someone else. It is also fate that I took this path....I belong here..my heart and soul belongs to him and i can never give my heart even a tiny bit to someonelse. I do hope in the years to come, nothing is going to change that.

anyways..what goes around comes around you know...if u're sneaky...you'll never know what your husband is doing behind you back...eeek..scary dowh!!!

The Quest for true 'LOVE'???

While I was browsing the net a few days ago, I came across a blog...and read a very interesting entry which made me ask a few questions to myself...again and again.

It is about a mother, whose daughter was sickly and was warded at a hospital. During her 2 weeks stay at the hospital, she found an angel who saved her daughter's life. But ...not only she found an angel...she said she also found 'love'...

She started to fall for her daughter's paed who is 20 years older. Although her husband is always by her side, some how or rather, she had weird feelings towards the doctor. But the doctor didn't know that his patient's mom has fallen for him.. Aioyohhhh!!!!! How can this happen?

After reading the entry... i asked myself ..can u really fall for someone after you've exchange vowswith each other? For all the years spent together...and now she has some feelings for the Doctor? Doesn't she feel guilty for having that feeling?

I tried to imagine myself in her position....since lately amir has been warded for a few times... and I started to laugh....

Considering..we had four paeds....let me recall...

The first was Dr. A.J....he was a very grand fatherly figure to my son. a very warm person and is always ready to provide lengthy explaination to his curious patients@moms. But we have stoped seeing him for quite sometime since he operates only on request.

Second was the late Dato' Dr. Abraham...was my paed and then my kids...

Third is Dr.Altaf.....a very kind and soft doctor. I feel comfortable whenever i bring my kids to see him..am always satisfied with the consultation given.

Fourth and current is Dato' Dr. M. A tall, serious man but he has the most patient compared to other paeds at the hospital. His clinic is always full and yet people don't mind waiting. Got grey hair but i don't think he's old. Overall..he's ok.

So..over and above.... have not fallen for any of these men..hahhaha and never will.

To me...my quest for true love has ended the day he promised my dad..he will be a husband who will protect me from all evils, be my shelter and shower me with love each and every moment of my life..until the day when death do us part.

He has been a great husband and a very patient man..specially when wifey is cranky.

You r still da one i love...=)

A new year...a new me..=)

How fast time flies. I remembered, just after i delivered Apai way back in 2003..I would imagine how i will be when Apai starts school. I figured when Apai starts his primary school....I'll still be a young mommy. (not so young la....).

And now..I'm comparing my own pics for any obvious signs of aging. *Sigh*...Ada...of course ada...

1. I'm starting to have eye bags;

2.Dark under eye circles

3.Mini wrinkles starting to show...I mean...MINI

4. Of course..have gotten flabb-ier

BUT..above all this...This year..I am very proud of myself for....the first time in my entire 28 going 29 years of life...I changed my hairstyle.

hahahah..yes..its a reality. For all the years after i got married...i have never let my hair down..it's always tied. I'm very satisfied with my new hairdo...a newly rebonded hair..hahhaha

And for the first time too i have the confidence to un-tie my hair.

And just recently..i had another hair-cut...a Bob cut...and hubby calls it Rihanna hair.Woohoo.

Oklah enough about the hairdo. Another resolution i have for this year is..whenever i write...I will make sure that whatever is written must be purely in either Bahasa Melayu or English. Not a rojak bahasa like wat i'm using now. SO for my next entry....i hope to see some changes....

My Justification for the abovementioned statement: (in bahasa) Kita mesti memartabatkan Bahasa Melayu sebagai bahasa ibunda. Kalau Orang Melayu tidak menjaga bahasa kita sendiri..siap lagi?

I must admit...my languages are not excellent...but I will try..to further improve by doing this practice. ( Kalau boleh laaa...)

tata for now...

Dugaaan........

Every year we will go for a family vacation.Usually its just 'in-sea' not oversea. So this year Ayah planned to go to Kuantan.A few days before Aidil Adha we arrived at Hyyat Regency Teluk Cempedak. The kids were so excited to go to the beach and swim at the pool. The weather was beautiful ....but only the first 2 days of our arrival. The rest was extremely wet.The kids had no choice but to swim in the bath tub..hehhe.

I would rate this vacation as a vacation yang tak berapa memuaskan. Because..in the first place...Apai had a fever..then it went down to Adik.

On the last day...which is Raya eve..we drove down to Atuk's house to celebrate raya. Jarang wooo dapat raya haji kat rumah atuk eversince i got married because we will always go back to Perlis.

When we arrived at atuks house, it was already 6.30pm. And of course a very gloomy day because of the weather. Tak sampai 15 mins kat rumah atuk...my sis, and my bro in law drove the three of us back to KL. WHy? because their were blood in amir's vomit. I didn't really panick (although i was..a little bit) but i didn't wanna show coz ..I am a single super mom at that point of time. Mama freaked out and instructed us to go back instantly and bring Amir to DSH.

When we arrived at DSH, it was already 8.30pm. Did a blood test..and..yup...warded.

So this is the first time i celebrated Raya at a hospital and without a hubby.=( . I hope i don't have to go thru this again for the rest of my life.

We spent 4 nites at the hospital. And my leave was streched from 2 days of annual leave to 4 days of emergency leave. I had a llllooooong break!!. And of course...i had panda eyes...tooo.=(

A few days after we were discharged, on a fine tuesday evening. i left early from mama's house. And when we reached home, my autogate didn't fucntion. Rupanya...my house is the onlyhouse without electricity. I went to my neighbour's house..luckily her hubby was on leave. They checked out the problem. And i called TNB..to my surprise i was caller no. 50 ...in line. I had to wait. And when i spoke to the customer service people, they say they can only come in two hours time, And at that time it was already 6.30 pm!!!!.

In the end, my neighbour bought a new fius...and then ..the electricity is back again..alhamdullilah. I can't imagine if on that day....i arrive home at the usual time. Aiyoohh....dugaan lagi.

Sometimes i gave up ..and ask why does it happen to me. But on the other hand...i take it on the positive aspect..there must be some hikmah despite all the kejadian yang berlaku. And of course all this has made me a stronger supermom!!! hahha.

Science Lesson No. 1

Last night, as I was driving home from Mama's, it was drizzling. And as usual, Apai will talk about his :

1) Uncle Bus dah lama tak datang so auntie bus yang hantar balik
2) Teacher X...yang asyik kata jawapan matematik dia salah..so he said teacher tu yang tak tau
matematik
3)girlfriend dia..Zahira duduk sebelah dia dalam bus sebab girfriend sorang lagi nama Railey absem (absent)

After a while, I asked him.."Apai lapar tak? Nak makan?"

"eemm nak...", he replied

"nak makan apa sayang?"

"mama..nape bila kita lapar...otak kita suruh kita makan?"

Here's Science lession No.1

"Sebab..bila perut kita lapar...dia bagitau kat otak kita...then otak kita bagitau kita suruh makan lah"..I said.

" oh.. ok..Mama..otak saya kata kena makan maggie" he said selamba.

TOINGGGGG!!!! there goes the science lesson...he knew i won't let him eat maggie.

" Tak boleh la maggie...apai kena makan chicken, sayur and blah blahblah", i replied

"Habis tu kenapa dulu -dulu..otak mama ngan papa suruh makan maggie je?"he asked again .

Lagi sekali tak tau nak jawab apa sebab dulu memang pun time malas nak masak and nak cepat..memang both of us makan maggie.

This time i just kept quiet and tukar topic...

hehehe there goes my science lesson no.1....

ciao for now.

Finally...

Finally.....rumahku dah siap di betulkan. Alhamdullilah. After a week of living in a kapal karam...yesterday...the three of us slept in our room. But more needs to be done. The kain baju especially. Nasib baik half of it was sent to the laundry.

Cuma, last nite and early this morning...i heard some not so good sound of water flowing in the tank and sometimes dapat dengar lagi bunyi pipe vibrate. I called Mr Yeap the contractor a few hours ago. He promised to send someone to look at it petang nanti. Looks like i have to again leave office probably an hour early. I hope this time its gonna be good for good.

Over the weekend, all of us except hubby went to Apai's first concert. It was fun!!. I was relieved to see Apai enjoying his dance called "Let's Celebrate". And after that Atuk took us for lunch at BK Hartamas. I guess Apai n frens can relax now after months of hardwork practising the steps.

Tapi...Smart reader is not closed for holidays yet. School is as usual until Dec 12. Haiya..kesian bebudak ni.

Well..today..I have a lot to catch up at work. And still waiting for hubby to call and update on his whereabouts as he was asked to assist the Haj operation in Jeddah pulak since flights to Madinah dah berakhir on Nov 15.

To hubby..take good care..we miss u....!

Bye for now..

I didn't ask for it.....

Kita selalu dengar orang kata...."kalau ada musibah yang melanda...kita mesti sabar dan redha menghadapi segala kejadian samada baik atau buruk...sebab....itu adalah dugaan Allah...dan apabila kita diduga...tandanya Allah sayangkan kita dan ingatkan kita..dan mungkin beri kita peringatan akan kelalaian kita selama ni."

Yes..I truly believe that. Beberapa hari yang lalu....ada musibah yang berlaku. and i feel its a dugaan yang besar (setakat ni) especially when hubby is not around. Walaumacamanapun, syukur sebab dugaan ni taklah seberat mana compared to rang lain yang macam-macam lagi ditimpa kesusahan.

It started on that Friday morning..while i was about to clean my face...with facial foam all over ...tetibe tak da air....DAMMM!!! time nak mandi time tulah air takde. It happened before. The main pipe kadang kadang vibrate so whenever it vibrates, bibik akan slowkan the main tap...lama-lama...pressure pun tak de and air pun tak naik.

I went down and took a quick bath with available water left.

later in the afternoon, I decided to go home early because i need to call the Indonesian worker to fix the problem.

When we reached home...apai was screaming.."Mama..rumah kita banjir...mama lupa nak tutp paip ke?" I was still clueless and blurr. I went in and was shocked to see water flowing from the stairs... everywhere is wet and flooded. Ran upstairs and was even shocked to see water dripping from the ceiling of the 3 bedrooms and worst still, the room that we turned into our closet (sebab tak buat wardobe lagi) the ceiling runtuh...yes runtuh...so u can imagine the condition of my house....my bed was totally wet and to sum up in just 4 words....everthinng's damaged and wet.

I was devastated. With hubby not around...i just dunno what to do.

When i spoke to hubby i broke down...I so want him to come home immediately ..but i know that is very impossible.

When I was more calmed, I called the contractor...and they did the fixing part...but till today its still not completed. I took leave for tommorow and the day after to clean up the mess after they repaired everything.

Oh well....I guess.. ni baru sikit je dugaanNYA. There must be a blessing in disguise despite all this. This incident has made me stronger in getting thru the challenges in life. I also realised that it is very hard to overcome situations like this when your husband is not around....because every decision you make..every step you take...its all on you. So ..thumbs up to all the single mums outhere.!! I salute you for your courage and strengths.

Ciao for now....

Just Another Ordinary Day

Today is just another ordinary day. hari ni pun taklah sebz mana because...no one is at office....
Mood nak buat kerja pun takda plus no outstandings left..soooo lega and sooooooooo boring la pulak sume kerja dah siap.

Yesterday wasn't ordinary......

It didn't start well that morning. Apai buat perangai lagi. Mula mula nangis tak nak mandi lepas mandi nangis lagi tak nak pergi school because tak suka teacher X sebab teacher X slalu marah sebab dia tak tau buat Maths...

I was in a hurry yesterday because i din't wanna be stuck in the jam and be late for my session.
I get more stressed when he can't stop crying and...with the existence of the butterflies in my stomach....it made things worst.

Apai was cyring hysterically in the car..and it was also raining very heavily..eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee geramnyer akakkkkk!!!. I decided not to send him to school because i Did Not want to create any scene at the drop off area of his school.

I left aand reached just in time before the event started.

It felt weird coz...a few years back..i was there as an employeee and yesterday i was there as a speaker.

Overall..I enjoyed..eventhough i couldn't really sleep the nite before thinking if its gonna be a smooth one for me.

I rewarded myself with a Subway sandwich...uummm yummy..!

While I was enjoying my sandwich, my phone rang..

"Mama..apai mintak maaf...tommorow i go to school",

" Hmmm ok....." I said.

" mama ..belikan Sugus kay..for aqid, me and adik"

ahhhaahhh.. I knew it....mintak maaf sebab ada udang sebalik mee rupenyer...am not sure if its a sincere maaf from my dearest son...=)

To hubby..miss u much.....

Ciao for today....

I'm sorry........

Yesterday I attended a Seminar at PJ Hilton. I left the hotel at about 3.30pm. I decided not to lepak lama2 at mama's house because I need to practice for my presentation at my old office tommorow( Am already having butterflies in the stomach).

We reached home at about 5 pm. Helped Apai with his Mandarin homework..or he prefers to call and spell as chinis. But of course ada je alasan tak nak habis kan the last page....some of his common reasons:

1. Teacher kata buat satu page jer mama..(yelah tu..)
2. Penatla mama..Apai tak Larat ni...and
3. Mama ..I want to do at nenek house tommorow morning.

To make things uncomplicated..I just follow like buffalo..sebab malas nak naik hangin...janji kerja siap. I believe..if he doesn't have the interest to do it at that point of time...the quality of work pun will be unsatisfactory.oklah sayang..nak buat kat rumah nenek pun buatlah..mama tak kisah.

After that, i decided to drink my cuppa coffee at our mini garden. Hujan pun renyai renyai..masa ni lah tersanggap sekejap kat hubby....tgh sanggap sanggap tetiba..my not so little sunshine yang malas nak buat homework tadi pun keluar. He started to pok pek pok pek..mama.this mama that... and i just answered mmhmmm..yea..ya..yes..ooh..oh yeke...oh ok...
(What a bad mommy!!!) Yelah..tgh melayan perasan..so agak malas nak melayan dia cakap.

He made a statement " Mama..u miss ur husband ye?"

Finally I said, " Lepas ni mandi ok?"

"Ok..Mama kita mandi berdua k, papa tak de so we can kissing kissng?" he said

I made a face..

"EEEEE tak nak lah..."

"Mama..why boys..cannot kiss gurls?"

" Because...they are not married yet" I said selamba.

" Ok then i want to marry zahira..( his classmate yang jugak comel...=)"

I asked" She likes u aaa?"

" Oh..tak nak lah... I want to marry Hani"

"Why?"

"Because Hani is my gangstarz"

HHHuhh? Dia ni tau ke apa dia cakap ni?

" Gangstarz?? What song do u sing?"
" Oh.. We sing...I love u u love me..we are happy family..lalallalalla( Barney song)

LOL!!! ntah pape ntah anak aku ni.

Later that nite... i was doing my toning exercise in the bathroom. Of course i had 2 little audience watching me. Then one of the audience came and wanted to take my wrist weight away.

"NNNNOPE..go back to the bed" I said sternly.

So ..this audience pun merajuk and baring on his papa's portion of the bed.

When I'm done...as i was wiping the sweats of my body...I told him..

"Apai..go and wee wee before u sleep k..tadi dah minum banyak air"

I think i said that very nicely for umpteenth time. But no response..
Aduhh..sungguh the terkurang the ajar!!!

I guess the temperature has reached to its maximum.. i raised my voice... and tak dengar jugak...and suddenly.....automatically for the first time in my life....i..took the towel and pukul his kaki...(tak skait pun..but later i think it got a little bit harder when he still make dunno.

Knowing my son.. he's very egoistic...tak nangis tak apa..expressionless.

When I cooled down...we had a talk...a looong talk... on why i did that and why he shouldn't do that again... we both started to cry.... He said sorry to me... and i hugged him and i apologised to him for doing that.,

Mama mintak maaf sayang...I din't mean to hurt you but i was stressed.

I'm sorrry...dear.... I love you....always and forever.

When everything got back to normal....we watched Penelope...but halfway thru..they dozed off. And I continued with watching Samantha Who...

HMMMmmm it is not easy to be a parent...I always pray that i will be a good mother to my kids..because the kids are a reflection of us.....

Ok chow for now.... Wish me luck for my presentation tommorow!!.

It Has Been A Week

It has been a week since Hubby left us. So far so good. I can firmly say my emotions are stable now. i repeat ..STABLE. Dah tak mudah nak nangis bila dgr lagu-lagu jiwang jiwang ni.
Thank you Sam ...for the comforting words.. I appreciate that.

Life is back to normal. Everyday..drive to Mama's drop the kids and off to work. After work to Mama's lepak2 makan2 ..drive home and sleep. That's my routine everyday.

During the absence of hubby, I will be undergoing MRO. That is if everything goes well as planned. Oh ya...before i forget, I saw on Carrefour's catalogue..the elliptical bike is going for RM 299. I don't know if its worth it to buy or not. I probably need that as part of my MRO process. But I'm also thinking if I should just get a stepper...selling for only 120..on ebay. According to a friend of mine, she cycles on the bike everyday for at least 20 mins 7 days a week and she could see a more decent shape of the thighs and buns.

But I'm just afraid that if I buy....it will be just a display item. Like ..hubby bought this Ab-Bench yang konon-kononnyer if u do everyday..within 14 days...u will get fabulous abs......... We did it for the first 3 days..tapi lepas tu..hmmm hampeh.....

So for this MRO procedure, I've purchased a bottle of health supplement drink. I hope it works.

Today is Friday..Yippeee!!! Can't wait to go back....
I already know what i wanna do tommorow. First half of the day..I''ll turn into a potato couch and watch the marathon Korean Drama on KBS World...and perhaps..later bring the kids somewhere.....
Sighh...wish u were here Hubby...

Bye for now...

P/s: MRO is maintainance, repair and overhaul..hehehee

A sweet email....

The first thing that i usually do when i reach office every morning is to check my emails. Luckily Boss is out of office since yesterday afternoon..so there shoudn't be any urgent mails or new tasks assigned. As i scrolled down... I saw an email from my long time no see hubby.

It was a simple and sweet email with a link to his favourite arabic music video. And it comes with the translation. Its such a sweet song...as i read the lyrics....*sniff* sedih la pulak.
And I guess the lyric is a direct translation from arabic. So pepaham jelah bila direct translation kan. But if u watch the video and compare the lyrics...u will understand what the song is all about.Here's the lyric and the music video.....Thank you sayang..so sweet of you..=).

When I was in your hands
I melted in my place
And I forgot my lifetime with you
And the time that passed with me was seconds
Draw me close
And let me live my feelings with you

I defy the whole world when I'm with you
And I say to the world itself that I love you
That you are my darling and my heart
And my soul is with you
Draw me close
And let me live my feelings with you

My adoration for you is an adoration of the moon from a star
And sleepless nights
And my desire for you is beyond the imagination
And beyond the possibilities of man
From the day I met you live has been sweet

With you I am challenging all that is present
Either I'll be with you or I won't be
I will not live without your love
My heart adores you madly

27/10/2008

Today is Mon and a public holiday. Didn’t have any plans today coz sista have got to go to office for some discussion. Ceh…I shud report this to the ministry of HR.
Oh well..the kids are bored rite now…and terpaksalah tgk DVD-meet dave while waiting to go to the park.

And me..i do not know what to do after this. Probably counting hours and minutes to go to work tomorrow..after a long break. Sigh…….AND …URRGHHH of course like there will be tones of tasks waiting to be executed…cehhh!!! I wish I’m a freelancer…

Chow for now………..


We went for dinner at Mak Jah Warung Kopi in Bukit Jelutong. The food is good!!
The Nasi Goreng Kampung is ssoooo delicious. No wonder memang ramai yang makan at Mak Jah.

When we arrived at Mak Jah, I wondered why we were directed to seat outside. Rupanyer ada shooting scheduled there. When I turned back, I saw Nanu, Rushdi Ramli and a few others.I don’t know for what filem/ drama. But one thing I’m sure is it’s a Shuhaimie Baba’s Production…..

Oh well…biarlah..janji my tummy kenyang…..=)

Good nite hubby..love you.

26/10/2008

We went to the zoo today. Ayang and Ira joined us. The last time I went to the zoo was I think 20 years ago..itupun school trip hehehe. I guess hubby and me are not so rajin like my sis and bro-in law. Ever since my nephew was 1, they brought him to the zoo every year without fail. Kalo dulu..the hippo was stil single , now dah beranak pinak..hehheheh.

Since it was a Sunday and on a long weekend, ramainya orang berkunjung ke Zoo. The entry fee pun dah increase(dari dulu la…according to my sis yang merupakan pengunjung setia zoo setiap tahun)…adults RM15 and kids RM6.

We began our little journey inside the zoo by visiting the elephants and the giraffes. Amir was sooo excited …..But then, second half of the journey, he was errr expressionless. Don’t know why but probably because of the hot weather and mengantuk kot.
The petting zoo for kids was closed for upgrading.

At about 1230 we were done. Drove to Pak Li Kopitiam in Sek 7 Shah Alam.
What’s good here…hmm I like the Nasi Ayam Lemon.Yummy!!! the kids loved it. We ordered 2 sets of fish and chips for them but in the end, they ate the nasi ayam lemon. The rice tasted like the usual nasi ayam but the chicken is crispy fried chicken with lemon sauce..i think.

Bila perut pun dah kenyang…memang rasa nak tido. We went back to my house and zzz…zzzz….zzz sampai petang. Bila everyone dah bangun…. Biasalah minum petang with kuih raya. Ayang and Ira left when it was almost magrib.
And suddenly…the feeling of misery …loneliness…and blah blah blah..attacked me again. Well.. I was not alone…my sis felt the same..coz both of us sanggap at our hubby.

Over and above….there were 3 people in the house yang very happy… my sons and Aqid. They were so happy…as though they were on vacation…heheh.

Hubby called later that night…tq sayang for calling again….I know u missed us too!!!

Good nite!!

Diary of a Temporary Single (but Not available) Supermom

25/10/2008

Today, we went to mom’s.had breakfast and then everyone went off to open house la, org kawin la… Me? Well.. I decided to pick up a parcel for hubby at the Post laju Centre at Brickfields. It contained a Pashmina, and 2 jubah. It was from hubby’s friend in Terengganu.

Then we went to Tesco Damansara…..KFC for lunch.

Pastu jejalan je kat Tesco tu ..bought some food stuff coz tonite my sistas will be sleeping over. Tomorrow we plan to bring the kids to the ZOO.

I wanted to bring Apai to the zoo looong time ago. Masa tu, ingat nak tunggu dia besar sket..bila dia dah besar…mama preganant pulak..so tak larat nak gi zoo. So I guess this is the rite time lah nak gi zoo. Takut kalo delay lagi…kang mama pregnant lagi pulak..hheheheh alamat sampai besar la hangpa tak pi zoo nooo.

Rite now…yang ada kat rumah is me, Amir and bibik. Apai went to Aqid’s house..and will be coming home later.

Hmmm in the car just now..bibik told me that she don’t want to sambung contract….
Nak balik kawin and jaga mak dia sakit. Adeehhhhhh…apo nak buek…….lepas ni kena train lain la nampaknye..duit pun terbang lagilah jawabnya….

Sedih jugak rasa…sebab tak tau la pulak lepas ni dapat bibik yang macamana.
I just hope we’ll get someone yang reliable jugak macam sekarang ni.
Although dulu banyak jugak la incident yag menyakitkan hati..tapi..she did well in taking care of my kids..itu pun yang penting skali.

Hmmmph……..=(.

Miss you sayang…take care.

Diary of a Temporary Single (but Not available) Supermom

24/10/2008

Last night, the three of us slept with hubby’s unwashed kain pelekat and his white pagoda shirt. Just to get ourselves to sleep and pretending that he’s around. We slept early….not in the mood to watch any shows on tv. I guess I dozed off at around 945pm after cleaning up some space in my handphone’s Inbox and reading all messages from hubby before he left.

It wasn’t a smooth sleep. I woke up at 1030…for nothing.

130 am ..received a text message from him

Read : I’ve arrived and currently queuing at the immigration. Gud nite and luv u all.

Alhamdullilah….he has arrived safely. I know their next journey is heading towards Mekah to perform Umrah. I went back to sleep…but woke up every now and then…..finally at 6.00 I woke up to perform Subuh prayer. And here I am writing till now.

Just for the record.. I’m taking medical leave today…..nope…not sick…but just unstable emotions. (is there such term?)

I guess…to calm my ‘chaotic’ hormones… I need to go on a shopping therapy alone.

Yeah..there’s a METROJAYA warehouse sale today. =)

Love u sayang..will be waiting for ur next sms……


130 pm…I received another text message from hubby dearest. He informed that they have completed Umrah after subuh Mekah time. And will depart to Madinah after Friday prayers. And he reminded me to inform Mak (Mom-In-Law) of his latest update.

Will do honey..tried calling her just now…but no one picked up. Will try again after this.

8.45 pm- everybody was already in bed. Amir’s battery ‘konged’ quite early tonite. Perhaps he was so tired due to his ‘busy’ schedule. In addition, he took his nap for just 15 mins so that explains why. Apai…as usual… didn’t stop asking me this and that…sometimes I felt bad sebab kekadang malas nak layan dia pok pek pok pek. But I know its not good if I tak layan dia cakap. I was surprised when he suddenly said..

“ Apai nak mintak maaf kat papa”

“Haaa?? Why?”
“Sebab Apai noti kat Papa”.

“ Oh..ok…takpelah nanti bila papa call Apai cakap kat Papa k?”

I continued to clean the bathroom. He came to me again….and whispered at my ears

“ Apai mintak maaf”

In my heart….leeehhh apahal plak budak ni asyik nak mintak maaf je ni.

“ Ok sayang…mama pun nak mintak maaf kat Apai…if mama ada marah2( memang banyak pun..heheheh) apai k. Just for your info… mama marah bukan sebab mama tak sayang… tapi sebab …mama SAYANG sangat kat Apai… tau…”

“OK..”

While I was getting ready to sleep …after taking flu medication…( baru 9.15pm…haiihh….memang tak terusik la Astro sepanjang hubby tak de ni..)…Apai said,

“Mama…rindu sangat-sangat la kat papa…...apai rasa tak boleh tunggu la lama2 4 papa to come home….”

“Apai sabar la..nanti tak lama lagi Papa balik laaa”


“Mama ..jom tgk gambar papa..”

After looking again-and again and his papa’s pics….I told him to sleep.

And seconds later…. I fell into a very deep sleep…(sebab ubat)

But as I was enjoying my sleep…tetibe the phone rang…..It was Kakak…(my eldest sister who is also holding the same status as I am…”temporary single super-mom” sebab hubby went to Bali ..but notfor long..in a few days time..he’ll be back. And while he’s away…she and my neph checked in at mom’s)

“ Siata….vat are u doing?”

“errrm sleeping..” , I answerd..dengan penuh mamainye.

“ Oh..guess what… Ira (my youngest sis who is 17) got kutu..hehehhe”

“Huhhh? Oh really…ok…”, I said with my eyes closed..mengantuk sgt.

“Oklah..are u coming 2morrow? Cause I got work and my son’s gonna be lonely if Apai takde”

“ok..I’ll come in the morning..”

“Ok”
“bye..”, and I hung up.

Then around 11ish …got sms from hubby..yeayy!!!

Tapi masih dalam keadaan mengantuk…I tried so hard to read the text with eyes half open..

He said.. he’s on the way to Madinah..and it’s gonna be a long journey…he’ll update upon arrival at Madinah.

Luv u hubby……take care.

Oh ya.. I forgot to mention that for my retail therapy, I spent almost 300 bucks…on what…? I pun tak sure..hehehe it felt like I was hypnotized during the therapy. Oh well..just a few items for myself and the rest for the house…..

P/s: Hubby.if u’r reading this…don’t worry…I did not over spend and I paid my credit card bills already….=).

Diary of a Temporary Single (but Not available) Supermom

23/10/2008

The day has finally arrived. The day my life became empty.
For one second today, it felt like there was no air to breathe when he let my hand go and slowly disappear from my vision…..

I suddenly woke up in the midst of a deep sleep. …It was only 4 am.
My angels were sleeping soundly. I turned to the other side and felt so relieved to see my other half sleeping peacefully. Yes..the miserable feeling has attacked me again in the early hours of Thursday morning. My cheeks felt hot…and soon…drops of tears rolled down…again..for..i don’t know kali ke berapa. Didn’t want to disturb his sleep, I sat at the end of the bed and just watched him sleep….still with tears running.

It felt strange to have this kind of feeling especially when this is not the first time he left for Haj. And usually, people say when u have kids with you…takdelah sedih sgt. Nope..its the other way round for me.

I moved closer to him …and starred at him blankly. Squeezed myself and made my way around his arms so that I can fall asleep again.

9.30 am we reached Kompleks Haji Kelana Jaya. Dropped him off and went straight to Mama’s and waited for his call. Then around 11 am, he called and it was time to leave for KLIA.

At about 12..we reached KLIA,after check- in, we headed towards Mc Donalds….for our last family lunch. The kids were excited and were running around. Sigh…maybe diorang tak faham lagi what’s going to happen later.

At this point of time, I managed my emotions quite well. Didn’t wanna make it so obvious in front of the kids and him. Then, Mama and Ira joined us. Time flies so fast today. …sigh..I wish I have the power to stop the clock from ticking…

2.50 pm…it was time for him to go…as we walked towards the escalator….i tried so hard not to burst into tears but I failed when he hugged and kissed the kids again and again…. And when it was my turn to salam….I broke down. We hugged each other….” Jgn la sedih….love you…drive carefully k..” I know he was sad too…but men..biasalahkan…tak macam kita ..yang tak boleh control langsung. Slowly…he let go of me …and walked away until there was no sight of him.

My vision was blurred. I walked towards the parking area. But all the way…I just don’t know what I was looking at….everything seems blur…I just followed the signage that says “P”.

Got into the car and drove slowly….while driving… I managed to text him…

“LUV U”
He replied “TAKE CARE…LUV U TOO…ALREADY IN THE AIRCRAFT…=(“


I drove on….and biasalah the journey from KLIA to our home…rasanya…
Adalah dalam 3 baldi air mata yang berjaya ditakung.

We reached home….and as I walked up the stairs heading towards our room….i cried again..sebab rasa macam tak sanggup nak masuk bilik because the thought of …his portion of our bed will be empty for the next 3 mths…

As usual ( I did this everytime he left for Haj) the first thing that I did was to smell his pillow coz…by doing that…I can smell him….

I hope this feeling of misery won’t be for long.

I love u sayang..till we meet again….